What is love?

Tuesday, July 15
Really what is it? I would never be able to tell you, ‘cos I’ve never been in love. & I don’t know anyone who really is capable of loving me….
I received this email about kids who define love & there are lots of nice words, still I can’t figure out what love is. Sometimes I can’t even tolerate my intimate ones, so how can I love some one I don’t know? It’s silly. I love human beings but that’s not “love” if you know what I mean. …. The matter has always been sort of taboo for me, a border I never step out of. The more I think about it, the more I understand that love is something I can’t get near to. People tend to run away when they get to close to me, because they are hurt. Even my close friends can’t bear me for a long time. On the other hand, I myself can’t start a relation & if any one does that, he/she would be turned down! What’s more I tend to give more in beginning, and then I start demanding more & more. Most people cease their friendship there….
A friend once told me that it’s about me not giving others the chance to love me! How can I give anybody a chance when there is no demand for it? By the way, as I tell others about my bad temper; those who know me a little don’t believe it! Like I don’t know myself. However as I reveal the characteristics they’ve been told about, I’m accused of being deceitful….
Strange, yet true; I’m not capable of loving & being loved…