Se6ual relationship has been the issue on my mind for quite a long time now. I have come to the conclusion that I act rather hypocritical toward the issue, though.
I mean I believe that being in love & being committed is enough to make 'love-making' ethical. Therefore, there should be no taboos for 2 people in love (regardless of the se*, age & all that Junk) to show their commitment toward each other by uniting their bodies, the way their souls should be united. Love is the only legal reason in my opinion to be intimate with someone; whether they are married or not is out of question of course… that's nobody's business!
On the other hand, any se6ual relationship is naughty way of having fun… let morals rest a bit & go wild! Let your body take control & take a well earned prize! What's wrong with 2 friends who trust each other to have a more physical 'friendship' while they are not committed to any other souls out there? What's wrong with having fun in the first place? Would se* bring commitment all by itself? Should these 2 be bound in a stricter frame just because they had fun?
Then I remember; Pleasure is a sin! & both frames do not work here in the constricted social ethics of this God forsaken country! Se* is referred to as 'marital relationship' which sums it all: no se8ual relationships out of marriage bounds! What about Homos, free souls & commitment-phoebes? What about the ones who have not found their soul mates yet & they are willing to wait to commit?
Then the next issue pops in my mind… what about the virtue of vir8inity? Is virginity a virtue at all? Should a body be only for one person forever for always & more?
I have no answers yet…. I see my friends who are committed in a relationship & are afraid of share some lovin' & I see other friends who have wild nights secretly & then boast about their 'virginity'… I also see friends of mine who have not been ready for any kind of commitment & now they are trapped in a bad marriage just because…. All of them are close & dear to my heart but none seems to have a healthy se* life….
Proshat
2 comments:
I think that a lot of our moral rules surrounding sex have their roots in sex being something very likely to result in children. But now that we have so many reliable methods of controlling that outcome, we may wish to reconsider our moral positions.
Great post.
Some thoughts:
1. "Would se* bring commitment all by itself?"
You mean legally or emotionally? If legally, I don;t think there should be any laws that govern our personal lives (that is what our parents are for). This issue is personal and has nothing to do with society at large. So no I don't think sex should legally result in marriage. But if you mean emotionally, then it depends on the person. For some people the proximity that sex requires is too intimate and should only be expressed within the framework of marriage. For some people it's as you said, a fun way of expressing their love. So there is no right or wrong answer. It all depends on your personality.
2. "Is virginity a virtue at all?"
Again it depends on the person and their sexual appetite. Again there is no one answer. The problem with today's society is that too often our personal decision and preferences are influenced/dictated by our government, family, or cultural.
I knew some girls in Tehran who only had extra-martial sex because they wanted to rebel against their social norms not because it was what they really wanted
Sometimes we forget to ask ourselves, "What do I want?" What would make ME happy?
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